Chapter 28: The Man After God's Own Heart

Genesis 6:9 – “These are the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man and perfect in his generations, and Noah walked with God.”
 
Job 1:1 – “There was a man in the land of Uz, whose name was Job; and that man was perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil.”
 
1 Samuel 13:14 – “But now thy kingdom shall not continue: the LORD hath sought Him a man after His own heart, and the LORD hath commanded him to be captain over his people, because thou hast not kept that which the LORD commanded thee.”
 
2 Timothy 3:16-17 – “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.”
 
            What does it mean to be a “man of God”? Why was David called a “man after God’s own heart”? Those two verses from Paul’s second letter to Timothy are among the most well known and most often memorized verses for many Christians, especially new believers. I memorized them as a kid in Sunday School, as well as verse fifteen of chapter 2 of that same epistle. “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needed not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” This well-worn topic has been on my mind more than usual lately. I have not kept it a secret on here what God has called me to do as a full time ministry: be a husband and father. Once I finally arrived at that revelation a few months ago, and then as I started looking ahead at 2023 and what I wanted to accomplish for my new year’s resolutions, there was only two items on my list. One, grow in my faith and my walk with the Lord; two, meet my future wife.
            As I wait for God’s timing regarding item #2, I have been focusing more on item #1. A few weeks ago, as I thought about what it means to be a man of God, I jotted down a short list of character traits that I felt would be evident in the life of a man after God’s own heart. All of these traits have manifested themselves throughout Bible as I have been reading cover to cover since first getting saved 2 ½ years ago. I’m now on my third round, and as I re-read the Old Testament this time, these ten attributes stood out to me more on this go-around than the previous two. One could probably make a list of twenty or thirty character traits that exemplify a man after God’s own heart, but all of them would boil down nicely to these ten, I think. I’ve listed them in a particular order for a good reason, and I think you’ll agree with me as I go through them why I chose this order.
            The man after God’s own heart:
 
           1. Puts God first, above ALL else!
       Exodus 20:3-4, Deuteronomy 4:23-24, 40, Joshua 24:14-15, Psalm 1, 25:4-5, 37:23, Proverbs 8:17, 9:10, 18:10, 23:17, 30:5, Matthew 6:33, 22:37-38
           Those verses are a mere sampling of the myriad of scripture where God’s children are exhorted to put Him first. Starting with the first two of the Ten Commandments, God makes it clear that those who follow Him and have accepted Him as their LORD and Savior “shall not have any other gods before Me.” (Exodus 20:3). The true man of God will put God first, above all else, in his life. That means putting God above myself, above my wife and kids, above my job, above my friends, above my church – above everything and everyone! No exceptions!
        And what does that look like in day to day life? General principles of effective, spiritual growth aren’t worth anything unless applied in a practical way to daily living. One of the best ways I have found to put God first is to start and end each day with Him. That means my alarm goes off at either 4:30 or 5 a.m. Monday through Friday (depending on what time I have to be at work). That gives me a whole hour of Bible study and coffee first thing before I even start my day. On the weekends, my alarm goes off at 6:30 or 7, but I still don’t do anything else until I have completed that first hour of devotions and reading my Bible. Then, in the evening, on my twenty minute commute home from work, I spend almost that entire time in prayer. While not just a memorized repetition of thankfulness, plea for forgiveness, and a list of all the people in my life I’m praying for, I do stick to an outline so that I make sure to have a full, complete and meaningful conversation with God and not just a quick, two minute “ThankYouLordYouAreAwesomeYouAreGreatHallowedBeThyNameAmen”.
        In addition to studying God’s word and talking to Him daily, another good way of putting Him first is tithes and offerings. And yes, this does mean putting money in the plate every Sunday (or setting up an ACH from my bank account to the church’s account on a bi-weekly schedule that matches my payday). But tithing also means giving of my time as well. I make sure to balance my work schedule and my church ministry schedule so that I am making time for service to God. I have been extremely blessed to be managing a store that is closed on Sundays. That means I don’t have to worry about missing Sunday School, or either of the morning and evening services, because of work. Not only that, my assistant manager has been willing to work the closing shift every Wednesday so that I am free to help lead Master Club at church on those nights. Aside from that, I have also made it a priority to help out where I can in the church body, such as driving one of my elderly friends to her doctor’s appointments during the week or any other errands she needs to get done if I’m off work and have the free time. And, as I detailed in an earlier chapter, I have been practicing my musical ability so that I can fill in as the pianist for Sunday services if needed. I think that giving of time and talent is just as important to God – if not more so – as giving of my monetary blessings.
         But putting God first doesn’t just mean day to day godly habits. It also means trusting God when our faith is challenged, when He allows trials and testing that force us to walk by faith and not by sight. While there are dozens and dozens of excellent examples of this throughout scripture, the one that’s my favorite is Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego from Daniel 3. This is one of the most famous stories from the Old Testament, and for good reason. These three Jewish men refused to bow down to an idol created by King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon. When the king called them into his presence and demanded that they obey his edict, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied, “If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.” (Daniel 3:17-18) This made Nebuchadnezzar so furious that he ordered them bound and thrown into the fiery furnace.
         Those three men put God first, above all else, even their own lives! They had no certainty that God would deliver them from the king’s wrath, but their faith was such that they were willing to face death in order to obey and honor God, and God rewarded their faith by protecting them from harm in the midst of the fire.
          Am I willing to do the same? Putting God first, above even my career, means that if I’m ever forced to choose between serving and obeying God or following an order from my boss that I know is morally wrong, I will always choose obedience to God, even if that might get me fired. I remember, many years ago, when I was perhaps eight or nine, my parents arrived to pick up me and my brothers from a friend’s house one afternoon after school. It was a Wednesday or Thursday, as I recall. I was surprised it wasn’t just my mom because dad usually didn’t get off work until after 5. Once we were back home, they sat us down and dad explained that he had been let go from his job at the car dealership where he’d been working for many years. The reason? His boss had ordered him to lie on a customer’s invoice by listing a charge for a service on their vehicle that hadn’t actually been performed. It wasn’t an especially large amount, and the customer would most likely have never known they were being defrauded. But that didn’t matter to my dad. He was being asked to lie and, thus, directly disobey one of God’s basic commandments. Therefore, my dad refused, and the dealership’s owner fired him for insubordination.
        This was in the late eighties, and my parents were both working full time jobs just to make ends meet. I remember thinking back then, after my dad explained what had happened, that it seemed silly for him to lose his job over a little thing like that. And, if I recall correctly, I might have even asked him at one point why he didn’t just go along with his boss’ request since he’d been working there for so many years. It didn’t seem right to me to sacrifice all that time and high wage for something as inconsequential as a “little white lie”. And even though dad patiently explained his reason once again, I still didn’t quite understand it. Now, however, I totally get it, and I can’t imagine how scared my father must have been as he left the dealership that afternoon for the last time. At that time, he’d been saved for only a decade, probably less, and this incident occurred only two or three years after my youngest brothers, the twins, were born, making four children total. I know mom wasn’t yet making much as a registered nurse with a private home health care company, so I can clearly imagine my dad questioning God with every step from the dealership’s garage to his car.
          But you know what? Not once during my childhood – ever! – do I remember a time when there wasn’t food on the table, clothes on our backs, a warm bed at night, and a roof over our heads. Yes, I grumbled and squawked loudly when mom informed us boys that they had to cancel the cable TV subscription. (I was really hooked on my afternoon dose of Ducktales after school every day, as well as my Saturday morning cartoon lineup.) But our basic needs were always met, and even a few extra blessings besides. (There was never a Christmas when the space under the tree in the living room was empty or even just half occupied.) My parents put God first, above all else, and He rewarded their faithfulness and integrity by providing all our needs, according to His own promises. My dad found a new job pretty quickly, and another decade or so later, that same boss that had fired him for his integrity re-hired my dad for a better position at another dealership precisely because of his integrity and Christian testimony several years earlier.
     Jesus himself stated this principle clearly when he was challenged by the Pharisees: “Thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment.” (Matthew 22:37-38) The only way to obey that command is to put God first in my life. If I don’t, then I am showing Him that I don’t really love Him. Love and total surrender go hand in hand. Can’t have one without the other.
         Which leads us to trait #2…
 
         2. Is humble
         Judges 13-16, 1 Samuel 15:22-23, Psalm 51:9-12, Proverbs 6:16-19, 16:18, 30:11-14, Luke 9:23-24, Romans 12:1-2
       That reference in Luke that I listed above is the famous passage where Jesus tells his disciples that “if any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.” He goes on to explain that whosoever tries to save his own life will lose it, and whosoever loses his life for the sake of Christ will save it. What Jesus meant was that the only way to follow Him was to die to the self. The man after God’s own heart will put aside his pride, deny his flesh, and obey God’s commandments. This must be done daily! Paul reiterates the same point in Romans 12:1-2. We are to present our bodies “a living sacrifice”. Humility requires that we acknowledge ourselves as slaves of Christ. What I want, or what I desire, or what I need is inconsequential. I care only for God’s will, what He wants of me, what He has set down in His word for all of us, what He desires. Humility means putting God’s will above my own.
        My flesh hates that! My flesh doesn’t want to submit, or to yield, or to obey any other will than my rotten, sinful desires. That’s why Paul was so adamant that we present ourselves as a living sacrifice every day, sometimes even every hour or every minute. Or, as Jesus put it, we must crucify ourselves every day when we wake up. That’s what “take up his cross” means. If I am going to serve God daily and be the man that He wants me to be, I must be willing to humble myself before Him, surrender my all on the altar, and walk in obedience in all aspects of my daily life.
      Salvation itself requires humility. No one has ever come to Christ except by first acknowledging their sinful, lost state. That fact alone is what has kept many out of heaven and on the broad, wide road that leads straight into hell. Pride was the sin that brought down Lucifer, and it’s the sin that is his greatest weapon in the war for the souls of mankind. Pride has kept many a sinner in the pew during the altar call, gripping the back of the pew in front of him/her for dear life, stubbornly refusing the Holy Spirit’s gentle tugging on his/her heart.
        “What will your friends think?” the devil whispers in their ear. “You’re just feeling a lot of emotions right now. You need some more time to think about this. Just hold on a little longer, the service is almost over. When you get home you can take some time to think about what the preacher said. There’s always time later to talk to him about this.”
         But, of course, later never really comes. There’s too many other distractions that Satan uses to get one’s mind off salvation ASAP. All around us in the everyday world are reminders that we can be strong in ourselves; we don’t need anyone to succeed; we can pull ourselves up by our own ingenuity, strength, resourcefulness, yadda, yadda, yadda. Only fools need the crutch of religion to get by in this life. Real men and women stand on their own two feet, and are just fine. But those of us saved by the blood of Christ and who have acknowledged His lordship know better. The exact opposite of all that is the truth.
         Two of the best examples (there are many) of the sin of pride in the Old Testament are Samson and Saul. Samson had everything going for him: good looks, God-given superhuman strength, and a natural charisma that made him an effective leader. But Samson’s biggest weakness was his pride. When he saw a woman of the Philistines that awakened his physical lust, he immediately demanded of his parents that they arrange the marriage as soon as possible. The fact that God had forbidden the Israelites to marry any of the men or women of the heathen nations around them was irrelevant to Samson. He saw someone he wanted, and he wanted her now. Instant gratification fueled by the lust of the flesh and his own pride was all that mattered to him. This, of course, led to his downfall and eventual death. Only in his final moments did Samson finally acknowledge the true source of his life and strength, and God did honor Samson’s last request so that the Philistines could be defeated and Israel saved.
        Saul, too, was a man who had everything going for him: good looks, tall, muscular stature, prowess with both sword and strategy on the battlefield, and – what seemed at first to be – good leadership skills. But, like Samson, Saul suffered a weakness of the ego. He couldn’t put aside his pride long enough to acknowledge and recognize the skills of others or even to acknowledge God, the true source of Saul’s elevation as king over all of Israel. Saul became jealous of David’s success and fame, and, rather than allow David to share the spotlight, Saul tried to kill him. Saul’s pride also made him impatient. Rather than wait for Samuel to come to Gilgal to make the necessary animal sacrifice on the eve of battle with the Philistines, Saul made the rash decision to perform the sacrifice himself. When caught in the act by Samuel, Saul made excuses rather than own up to his sin.
        Later, after disobeying a direct order from God to slay all the Amalekites, Saul once again made excuses when confronted by Samuel about his disobedience. Again and again throughout his short reign as the first king of Israel, Saul never learned to humble himself before God and seek counsel before making major leadership decisions. Instead, he let his pride dictate his choices, and thus Samuel proclaimed, “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, He hath also rejected thee from being king.” (1 Samuel 15:23)
        By contrast, King David, many years later, when confronted by the prophet Nathan regarding David’s sin with Bathsheba and his arrangement of Uriah’s murder, recognized and acknowledged his sin before God. He fell on his face, begging God to not hide His face from David, to create in him a clean heart, and renew a right spirit within him. David exercised true humility in that he acknowledged his sin nature, and that he needed God to “Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.” (Psalm 51:7) This is the main reason God called David a “man after His own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14). True, genuine humility will manifest itself in a contrite and tender heart always before God. It is the hardened heart, the one that refuses to confess sin and refuses to turn away from pride, that God hates above all else. (Proverbs 6:16-19)
 
           3. Is repentant (a.k.a. surrendered)
             1 Samuel 16:7, 2 Kings 22:10-13, 2 Chronicles 7:14, Psalm 32:5, 34:6, 51, Proverbs 23:26, 28:13, James 4:6-8
        2 Kings 22 and 23 describe the reign of Josiah, the son of Amon, the son of Manasseh. Both Josiah’s father and grandfather “…did that which was evil in the sight of the LORD, after the abominations of the heathen, whom the LORD cast out before the children of Israel.” (2 Kings 21:2) Josiah, however, was different. Ten years after ascending the throne, when he was still a young man of eighteen, he heard for the first time the book of the law of the LORD. Hilkiah the high priest had found it during the renovation and repair of the temple which had been ordered by Josiah that same year. 2 Kings 22:11 says, “And it came to pass, when the king had heard the words of the book of the law, that he rent his clothes.” He then commanded Hilkiah, the scribes and his servants to “Go ye, enquire of the LORD for me, and for the people, and for all Judah, concerning the words of the book that is found: for great is the wrath of the LORD that is kindled against us, because our fathers have not hearkened unto the words of this book, to do according to all that is written concerning us.” (v.13)
        Josiah demonstrated true repentance. As soon as the Mosaic law was read to him he immediately understood its significance, and he also understood his own sinful state, as well as the sinful, wicked state of the nation because of what his father and grandfather – and the kings before them – had done. True, genuine repentance requires a change of heart, followed by an outward demonstration of that change. The rest of the chapter of 2 Kings 22 and part of chapter 23 describe how Josiah restored the temple, executed the idolatrous priests, tore down the altars to Baal in the high places, and then led the nation of Judah in the observance of the annual Passover Feast, which had not been properly observed by Judah for many generations.
         The godly, upright man will daily be searching his heart and his life, asking God to show him where any sin has taken hold. And, once revealed, he will root out that sin immediately and then ask forgiveness of the LORD. This is why a close, daily walk with God is so vital to every believer. Only when we are sensitive to the voice and the leading of the Holy Spirit can we be aware of when we go astray. Even the smallest sidestep off the divine path will feel as painful as a sword through our hearts.
Proverbs 23:26 perfectly sums up this trait: “My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.”

           4. Is patient.
              Numbers 32:6-13, 1 Samuel 16:11-13, Psalm 27:14, 37:9, 46:1-2, 10, Isaiah 40: 28-31, Romans 5:3-5, 2 Timothy 2:3, James 1:2-4, 2 Peter 1:5-7
         Patience has become a lost virtue these days. Because of the technological age in which we now live, we can have almost anything almost instantly. It’s now possible to never leave one’s home and have pretty much anything from groceries to clothes to furniture polish delivered to one’s doorstep the same day. One doesn’t even have to speak to a live person to do this. All one needs is a smartphone and the right app.
          When I was a kid, if I wanted something – a new stereo for my bedroom or a Star Trek starship model kit, for example – my parents told me to start saving my allowance. And, depending how soon I wanted that new purchase, I could also supplement my allowance by doing chores around the house or the neighborhood: mowing lawns, delivering newspapers, cleaning out the garage, etc. That took an immense amount of patience and hard work for a twelve year old boy. Now, as an adult in the age of Amazon and eBay and Best Buy Online, I can purchase a brand new MacBook Pro laptop by paying nothing now and opting for monthly installments over the next year. I don’t have to exercise patience by saving a little each month from my bi-weekly paychecks until I have enough to purchase the computer all at once.
          That luxury, combined with the technological ease of doing the whole transaction from my living room sofa, has created a mindset that has caused many of my generation – and the next coming up – to adopt a “right now” mentality for every aspect of our daily lives, not just online shopping. I’ve lost count of how many emails I see in my junk folder every morning whose headlines scream “Lose 20 pounds in seven days with this miracle diet pill! No exercise needed!” or “This cream will erase wrinkles overnight!” or “Master a foreign language in just 30 days with this app!”, and the list goes on and on. Even the ads for protein powders and similar nutritional supplements promise bigger muscles and tighter abs in “…just one week, or your money back, guaranteed!” Many of us today – myself included – are tempted to take the quick, easy road to better health, or weight loss, or a good night’s sleep through the miracle of modern medicine rather than by putting forth the old fashioned, nose to the grindstone, elbow grease, sweat-in-the-eyes hard work through daily exercise and healthier habit choices.
          This applies to marriage and relationships as well. Gone are the days when a young couple would spend months – or even a year – dating before even thinking about marriage. Now you can find “true love” instantly on a dating app and be hitched within 60 or 90 days. I live in a city that is famous for spur-of-the-moment weddings (and equally quick divorces the next week when the party hangover – as well as the Visa bill – arrives). It’s a well documented fact that social media has ruined the art of true friendship. Most of us – again, myself included – find it easier in our hectic daily schedule to just check in with folks via a quick text or an instant message on the app rather than a 30 or 60 minute phone call two or three times a week where we actually talk to one another without interruptions or distractions.
         Good ol’ fashioned, tried and true, battle tested patience is a rare virtue. But, once learned and mastered, it’s a priceless treasure. In 1 Samuel 16, God told the prophet to go to Jesse in Bethlehem to anoint the next king of Israel. Seven of Jesse’s sons were brought before Samuel, but God told him that none of them were His choice. Then Samuel asked Jesse, “Are here all thy children?” (v.11) Jesse then replied that the youngest, David, was out in the field attending to the sheep. The boy was called in, and God said to Samuel, “Arise, anoint him: for this is he.” (v.12) At this time David was about fifteen or sixteen years old. Verse 13 ends with this: “…and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that day forward. So Samuel rose up and went to Ramah.” Notice what is missing from that verse. It doesn’t say, “And David became king of Israel that day.” In fact, it wasn’t even the next year, or the year after that, or the year after that that David ascended the throne. David didn’t officially take his place as king of Israel until he was thirty years old! Think about that for a minute. Samuel anointed him at fifteen or sixteen and then it was another fourteen or fifteen years before David actually had the crown placed on his head and he sat on the throne.
       There was a lot that happened in those years between the anointing and the ascension as ruler. That day that Samuel anointed David, David immediately returned to his flock and his daily responsibility as shepherd. Shortly after that, he was summoned by Saul to serve in Saul’s court as a musician and, later, amor bearer for Saul during battle. David slew Goliath, defeated thousands of Philistines in battle, lived for many years as a fugitive in the wilderness being hunted by Saul, and then, finally, became king of Israel. God used all of that life experience to train and mold David into the leader that he needed to be in order to rule the nation as a man after God’s own heart. Had God put David on the throne immediately following his anointing, David would have very likely failed miserably as a king, even with God’s blessing, simply because he wasn’t ready. He needed time to grow and learn and gain life experience that he wouldn’t have had any other way. And the key ingredient to all that growth and learning: patience.
      David had at least two opportunities to kill Saul, and thus ascend the throne that much sooner, but he refused. David acknowledged the wisdom and providence of God’s timing, not his own. Even though killing Saul made perfect sense, and even though David would have been fully justified in doing so, David was wise enough to recognize that it wasn’t yet time for him to become king. He was willing to wait on God, even – and especially – when God’s plan and timetable for David’s future wasn’t at all clear.
       Patience and spiritual endurance are two of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn over the last 2 ½ years since becoming a Christian. I’ve already detailed most of that struggle in my previous journal entries, so I won’t re-hash them here. But I will say that I am now in my best streak yet of successfully resisting the temptation and desire for pornography. As I write this, I am on day 36, and, thus far, the Lord has been gracious in that He has not allowed the severe testing and tempting that I have endured more frequently over the last two years than in the last six weeks. Every time I fell down, went astray, or gave into temptation instead of standing strong in the Lord’s armor, I thought I was getting nowhere. It felt like I was just spinning my wheels even though I would always pick myself up and get back in the race. Now, looking back over all that spiritual struggle and growth, I’m starting to understand what patience and endurance really means when applied to the daily life of child of God who has both the Holy Spirit and a body of sinful flesh. The desire to sin, to walk after the flesh, is much more diminished now, in these last few weeks, than it has ever been since the day I was saved. There will be more trials and testing ahead, I am sure. But I’m more than prepared, and I know now how to better endure and walk through that fire than I did two years ago.
       It's not just about patience and endurance, though. The man after God’s own heart…

         5. Practices self-control.
             Proverbs 7, Romans 6:6-7, 12-14, 18, 20-23, 7:14-21, 24-25, 8:14-17, 12:1-2, 13:14, 1 Corinthians 3:16-17, 6:9-11, 18-20, 10:13, 2 Corinthians 5:17, 6:14-18, Galatians 5:16-21, 6:7-8, Ephesians 2:1-5, 4:17-19, 22-23, 29-32, 5:1-7, 15-16, 6:10-18, Philippians 4:8, Colossians 3:5-7, 10, 2 Timothy 2:3, 22, Titus 2:11-12, 1 Peter 1: 13-16, 2:11-12
        Patience and self-control go together like peanut butter and chocolate, especially when it comes to enduring and surviving spiritual battle. Most of the verses listed above speak of surrendering our flesh to the Holy Spirit and, thus, refusing to walk after it. Paul stresses over and over the necessity of daily surrender to the LORD. (Romans 12:1-2). Only in this way can we truly gain victory and show forth the fruits of the Spirit. But Proverbs 7 gives warning about a different form of self-control. In Solomon’s cautionary tale, an innocent young man who lacks wisdom and understanding is lured to the bedchamber of a harlot whose husband is out of town. Verse 22 says “He goeth after her straightway, as an ox goeth to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks.” In verse 27, he warns of the adulteress, “Her house is the way to hell, going down to the chambers of death.”
       In addition to the sin of pride, a lack of self-control was Samson’s other major weakness. In fact, Samson suffered the exact fate of the fictional young man in Solomon’s tale. Samson’s lust for Delilah was his undoing. No, she wasn’t married, but, as I noted earlier, she was a Philistine, not an Israelite, and thus forbidden by Mosaic law to marry Samson. But because Samson lacked self-control, he let himself be seduced by her, and she was the direct cause of his downfall and death.
     Both David and Solomon practiced polygamy, which God expressly forbade in the Levitical law that he dictated to Moses. Every single instance in the Old Testament, whenever the men of God succumbed to poor moral judgment, it never ended well for them and their children. Solomon was the greatest, wisest and wealthiest king of Israel. Because of his humility and surrender to God, and because he asked God for wisdom instead of wealth and power, God blessed Solomon with all three. His fame spread throughout the entire middle east, and there was none like him. “And there came of all people to hear the wisdom of Solomon, from all kings of the earth, which had heard of his wisdom.” (I Kings 4:34) But, just a few chapters later, we read these verses: “But king Solomon loved many strange women, together with the daughter of Pharaoh, women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Zidonians, and Hittites; of the nations concerning which the Lord said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love. And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart. For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father.” (I Kings 11:1-4, emphasis mine)
       In the ancient near east, marriages were most often used to secure political alliances. Rather than obeying and relying on God to protect and provide for his chosen people, Solomon displayed a lack of self-control and egregious pride by giving into his carnal desires and practicing polygamy. It’s very likely he used the excuse of securing international stability and peace with the foreign empires that surrounded Israel to justify his seven hundred marriages, and, in the end, exactly as God had warned Moses, those heathen marriages were Solomon’s – and, eventually all of Israel’s – undoing. It’s a sad irony that the author of Proverbs 7 failed to heed his own warning and wisdom.
      The man after God’s own heart will exercise discernment and wise moral judgment in all matters of his life. That means obeying God’s commandments and practicing self-control in all things, but especially when it comes to temptation and the desires of the flesh.

        6. Is focused (a.k.a. steadfast and faithful).
        2 Timothy 2:15, 11-13, 3:1-5, 4:3-4, 7-8, Philemon 5-6, Hebrews 11:24-26, 1 Peter 1:7, 5:8-11
        “Then answered I them, and said unto them, The God of heaven, he will prosper us; therefore we his servants will arise and build: but ye have no portion, nor right, nor memorial, in Jerusalem.” (Nehemiah 2:20)
         The entire book and life of Nehemiah is an excellent lesson in Christian leadership and faithfulness. Nehemiah was an ordinary citizen, serving a foreign king in a foreign land, a lowly cupbearer who was called by God to do something extraordinary. God gave him the courage to ask King Artaxerxes for permission to return to Jerusalem and rebuild the walls, and the king not only said ‘yes’ but also wrote a letter of confirmation and authority to send with the Israelites to give to the local governors. The letters ensured that Nehemiah and the Jews would have all the materials they needed from the governors to rebuild the walls of the city and the temple itself.
         But no sooner had the Israelites arrived and begun their work than Sanballat and his crew of Ammonites and Arabians started to make trouble for Nehemiah. (2:19) Nehemiah’s response was swift and firm (v.20), and he never wavered, despite numerous attempts from Sanballat and the Samarian army to sabotage the reconstruction. At one point, Sanballat even sent a message to Nehemiah, inviting him outside the city to a distant location of neutral territory to discuss a truce. But Nehemiah, blessed by God with shrewd wisdom and discernment, saw right through the ploy, and basically said, “Naw, I’m busy, thanks. God bless & have a nice day.” (6:1-3).
         Not even the threat of war from the Samarians, Ammonites and Arabians slowed Nehemiah. He stationed soldiers at every worksite along the wall to guard the workers, and even some of the workers themselves had a trowel in one hand and a sword in the other. (4:17-18) Nehemiah would not allow anything to break his focus on his mission and his goal. He was determined to finish rebuilding the wall of Jerusalem, and his faith in God was so great that he didn’t fear what his enemies could do to stop him. God honored that faithfulness, and He also prompted the Israelites a couple decades later, through the prophet Haggai, to not allow that faithfulness and focus to lag.
       The Israelites had finished rebuilding the city wall, but then they got distracted with rebuilding their houses, planting new crops, and all the other necessities of daily life that came with moving back home and repopulating the land (including, once again, intermarrying with the heathen nations around them). The book of Haggai contains three direct message from God to His people, reminding them of where their focus and priorities should always be: on Him and Him alone. “Is it time for you, O ye,” God challenged them,  “to dwell in your cieled houses, and this house lie waste?” (1:4) The word “cieled” means “paneled”, indicating that the Israelites had used some of the lumber that had been set aside for the temple in the reconstruction of their own houses. This type of construction was a luxury in the middle east, an indication of great wealth. God was upset with His people that their houses were complete while His was still laid waste. They had lost focus and their faithfulness had waned.
        Steadfastness, focus and faithfulness require putting God first, and keeping Him first, no matter what! No matter what responsibilities and distractions and other trappings of our daily lives, we must remember, as the old saying goes, to “keep the main thing the main thing.” Satan loves to get us off track by subtly diverting our attention and shifting our focus to the problems in our marriage, or a fight with our boss, or issues with our kids, or an alarm that didn’t go off when it was supposed to and thus throws off our whole schedule for that day. It’s so easy to lose focus and get distracted with the myriad of crises – big and small – that take up most of our days. But, like Nehemiah, we can learn to keep our gaze on the LORD and recognize all of the enemy’s diversions for what they really are: tactics to catch us off guard and off balance.
        Nehemiah saw right through Sanballat’s attempt to lure him outside the city where the Horonite could then kill him. Had that happened, the whole rebuilding enterprise would have been thrown into chaos, and God would have had to intervene in another way to keep the work going forward. But Nehemiah recognized the great responsibility of his role as leader of the reconstruction effort, and, because of his focus and determination, he didn’t let himself be distracted or deceived. That’s another important lesson for the man of God. If we, as leaders, are focused on the LORD and have our priorities straight, it’ll be a lot harder for the devil’s distractions and subtle deceptions to get into our homes and churches.

          7. Is not lazy.
          Proverbs 6:6, 12:24, 27, 15:19, 18:9, 19:15, 24, 20:13, 21:25, 22:13, 26:13-15, Ecclesiastes 10:18, Romans 12:1-2, 2 Thessalonians 3:10
            This trait speaks for itself and needs no lengthy treatise or explanation. Those verses in Proverbs are simple and straight to the point: God rewards diligence and hard work; laziness and sloth are punished. I have found that the more I strive to be busy and productive in my daily life – and, especially, in serving God – the harder I have to fight the desire to sleep in, or just veg in front of the TV at the end of a long day, or put off my workout routine because I’m too tired. General laziness has become my biggest weakness of late, and it’s not hard to see why. As I said earlier, the devil loves to use all manner of subtle weapons against us in his hope to keep us off balance and, thus, lose focus of our goals in serving God.
            As I’ve discussed in previous a previous post, one of the biggest changes that I noticed right away after getting saved was a fresh, new desire to get busy and active for God. I no longer wanted to just waste away on the couch, streaming a steady diet of Hollywood garbage, as life passed me by outside my front door. I wanted to be the best that I could be for my LORD and Savior: physically, spiritually and mentally. That meant shutting off the TV, getting off the couch, starting a daily workout routine, setting time aside every morning for Bible study and prayer, adjusting my work schedule so I could be in church every Sunday and Wednesday, as well as time set aside for other ministries and helping out throughout the week, and, in short, exchanging all my old, slothful habits for a new and diligently productive lifestyle. Now, to be sure, this wasn’t all accomplished overnight. Instead, I made gradual steps here and there, small changes that slowly added up over time. However, looking back now, 2 ½ years later, I’m still amazed at how quickly – and how greatly – my daily life and routine have changed in such a short time span.
            But, even after all this time, after the new habits have taken firm hold of my daily schedule, I still have to fight the urge on Saturday and Sunday mornings to skip Bible study so I can sleep in an extra hour. I still have to tell myself ‘no’ to the Reese’s peanut butter cup and reach for an apple instead. I still have to force myself to do a 30 minute high intensity workout at the end of a long day when I’d rather just relax on the sofa with an old episode of Star Trek:DS9. Doing what I know to be good for me instead of what just feels good requires self-control. One cannot practice true diligence without some measure of self-discipline, and that’s never easy, no matter how ingrained the new, healthy habits have become. My old, sinful flesh hates what is right and good for me, and that old man does his best to lure me back to the couch and my former, lazy life.
            That’s why Paul’s directive in Romans 12:1-2 is so important. I must present my body and my self as a living sacrifice every day if I want to be my best for God. There are no couch potatoes in the LORD’s army, amen!

         8. Keeps a prayerful heart.
             Psalm 34:6, 46:10, 66:18, 86:6, 88:2, 102:1, 17, 141:2, 143:1, Proverbs 15:8, 29, Daniel 9:3, Matthew 6:6, John 17, Romans 8:15, Galatians 4:6, 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18, Hebrews 4:16, James 5:13-16
         There’s a lot that goes under the umbrella of this trait. I chose the phrase “prayerful heart” because it describes the consistent, daily state of mind that the man of God should always be in: thankful, rejoicing, obedient, humble, meek, earnest, repentant, servile and forgiving. All of these things should manifest themselves not just in our prayer life, but our daily life as well. The only truly effective way to grow in our walk with God is through consistent church attendance, fellowship with other believers, Bible study and prayer.
        Prayer is a key component of that formula. Talking with God daily, bringing our needs and requests to Him, thanking Him for all our blessings, or just simply telling Him about our day builds a close, personal relationship with our heavenly Father that can’t be formed any other way. Not even just reading His word is enough. Yes, God can speak to us through the scriptures, but He also speaks through the Holy Ghost during our prayer time. As with other facets of our Christian life, learning to listen for God’s still, small voice is a skill that needs lots of practice, and I freely admit that this is one area in which I’m probably the weakest. Even though I’ve developed a daily habit of prayer, and even though I’m far more comfortable talking to God now than I was 2 ½ years ago, I still struggle sometimes to be calm and quiet and listen for His voice.
         But then, as we get up from our knees at the beginning of every day, we should be practicing all of those things I listed above as we walk in the world and interact with others we meet throughout our day. This is how we manifest Christ to the world around us. People should see a difference in our behavior and what we say and how we respond to those who mistreat us or do ill against us. Maintaining the habit of a prayerful heart – and all that comes with that – will ensure a living testimony that, if done correctly, will preach Christ to everyone we meet, sometimes even without us saying single word.

         9. Always seeks wisdom.
        Joshua 1:8-9, 1 Kings 2:2-4, 3:6-9, Job 23:12, Psalm 1, 19:7-11, 119:105, 139:13-16, Proverbs 1:7-9, 3:5-6, 8:17, 9:10, 16:9, 19:8, 23:4, James 1:5-6, 3:17-18, 1 Peter 1:13-16
          Psalm 1 is a perfect summation of this trait. The man of God is always seeking wisdom. As I noted earlier, Solomon sought wisdom above all else because his father, David, had taught Solomon the value of God’s teachings and instruction. Christ instructed His disciples to “seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33) And what’s the primary way that God provided us to seek His wisdom? His written word, of course! This is why consistent, regular Bible study is so important in the daily walk of the man of God. How can I know God’s plan for my life if I don’t study the lessons of the godly men that have come before me? How else can I avoid making the same mistakes except by learning from their faults and weaknesses?
         God did not go to all the trouble of preserving His word over thousands of years just to have me open it only once a week on Sundays. The best part of my day is that first hour when I have only my Bible and my steaming mug of coffee. It utterly baffles me to hear of fellow Christians who have no hunger for the Word, who do not dissect it, study it, analyze it or memorize it. I am immensely blessed to be part of a church family where all of my brothers and sisters and my pastor have that kind of passion for the Bible. Many a pleasant Sunday evening after the evening service has been spent in fellowship with the other men, discussing, debating and/or hashing out doctrine or Biblical mysteries or some teaching point that was brought up in the sermon.
        The best way to gain godly wisdom? Proverbs 27:17 – “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” Another of my greatest blessings is one of my best friends, Jon Mott. He and I have weekly Bible studies over the phone, and I have come away from many of them with an even greater hunger for the study of God’s word. As godly men, we must seek out consistent fellowship with other godly men. That’s one of the many important reasons for consistent, faithful church attendance. There’s no other way to effectively gain godly wisdom than by learning from my pastor and fellow brethren as we all study the Word.
         Hebrews 10: 25 – “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is ; but exhorting one another : and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.”

          10. Is a leader.
                Genesis 37 - 50
          There’s a reason I saved this specific trait for last. I think this one should be ranked number two on this list, but the only way to become an effective leader is by first practicing and implementing the other nine traits that I listed above. It seemed more fitting, therefore, to discuss it last. Like the different shaped pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, the previous nine traits that describe a man after God’s own heart all neatly fit together to form this final characteristic. And, while there are many great men throughout the Bible that are excellent examples of godly leadership, the one that best exemplifies all ten of these character traits, in my humble opinion, is Joseph.
         The story of Joseph is my absolute favorite of all the stories and legacies in the Old Testament. Not only is it a ripping good old fashioned saga of family squabbles, political intrigue, character drama, and heroic adventure, all of it laced with genuine heart and emotional resonance, but it’s also an amazing account of God’s providence, protection and guidance in the lives of the family that would eventually create the nation of His chosen people, the Israelites. The saga of Joseph is an origin story of the greatest kind, told from the single perspective of one man central to the whole epic. (Yes, I know, an argument could be made that Abraham’s story is the true origin story of the Israelites, but, for me, Joseph’s epic – and its sequel in the book of Exodus – is where all of God’s promises to Abraham really blossom into reality in a style and saga that’s more exciting and more emotional than Abraham’s story. You’re welcome to disagree.)
          Joseph was an idealistic, probably spoiled, and most definitely naïve young man. The youngest of Jacob’s eleven sons, Joseph was his father’s favorite and Jacob didn’t try to disguise this fact. Joseph was also prone to bragging, and he eagerly told his brothers of his unusual dreams. God had gifted Joseph with a talent for interpreting dreams, and this – along with their father’s open favoritism of Joseph in the form a gift of a coat of many colors – caused great jealousy and anger among the sons of Jacob. As a result, they conspired to kill Joseph, but Rueben had sympathy on his youngest brother, and he convinced the others to spare Joseph’s life, trapping him in a pit instead. They dipped the colorful coat into goat’s blood and made up a story about Joseph’s death to tell their father. But while Rueben was away from the group, Judah convinced the others to sell Joseph to a band of Ishmeelites passing through that region on their way to Egypt. In just a few short days, Joseph found himself all alone in a foreign land, far from home, a slave in the house of Potipher, the captain of the Pharaoh’s guards.
       (Side note: Joseph’s story is not just about Joseph. Read Genesis 38 and then closely examine Judah’s character throughout this saga, and you’ll see why God chose the tribe of Judah to be the lineage of the house of David that would eventually bring forth the Messiah, Jesus Christ.)
          It’s at this point that Joseph, at the tender age of seventeen, began to display the traits that would later bear him out to be a man after God’s own heart. Joseph was very likely overwhelmed, afraid, anxious about the future, and wondering if God had abandoned him. But Joseph had also learned well from his father the lessons of who God is and what it means to trust in Him, no matter what the circumstances of one’s life. Joseph could have thrown himself a pity party, whined and bemoaned his fate, refused to cooperate with his taskmasters, and that would have very likely been the end of his story. Instead, Genesis 39: 2-4 says, “And the Lord was with Joseph, and he was a prosperous man; and he was in the house of his master the Egyptian. And his master saw that the Lord was with him, and that the Lord made all that he did to prosper in his hand. And Joseph found grace in his sight, and he served him: and he made him overseer over his house, and all that he had he put into his hand.”
         In other words, in a display of remarkable courage, wisdom and faith, Joseph rolled up his sleeves, dug in his heels, and adapted to his new, unexpected life. He did what he was told, and he did it to the best of his ability – no matter how small or insignificant the task. God not only blessed Joseph because of his diligence, but also gave him grace in the eyes of Potipher and the other taskmasters. Everything Joseph did prospered, and he quickly rose in the ranks of Potipher’s household, gaining the captain’s trust and favor in the process. That ability to quickly adapt and recognize opportunities in the mist of unexpected crisis or trouble is another trait of the man of God. It wasn’t specifically named as part of my list, but it falls under the trait of faithfulness and focus. If we are always in tune with the Holy Spirit and listening for God’s leading, we should be able to adapt and change direction when God says, “Turn here!”, even if we don’t completely understand all the reasons behind our sudden change in circumstance or situation.
       However, it wasn’t long before God threw another curveball at Joseph. Potipher’s wife, perhaps jealous of Joseph’s success or desiring him because of his youth and good looks, sought to seduce him. She made her first move on Joseph on a day when all the other slaves and Potipher were out of the house. Joseph, again, displayed exactly the right response: he refused, explaining to her that his master had given him authority over all the house and the other servants, but had not given to Joseph his wife. She was off limits. Potipher’s wife initially backed down, but not for long. Day after day for the next few weeks she continued her attempts at seduction, and Joseph kept rebuffing her every move. Potipher’s wife finally became so angry and frustrated with Joseph’s refusal to give in that she caught him one day when it was just the two of them alone in the house, grabbing his robe, and refused to let go. “Lie with me,” she said. (39:12). Joseph fled the house, leaving his robe behind.
       Aside from an outstanding example of how the man of God should endure temptation with patience and then flee from it when all else fails, Joseph also showed strong self-control. It would have been very easy for him to give into Potipher’s wife. He was, after all, a healthy, vibrant young man, nineteen or twenty by this point, with all the physical needs and urges that come with that age. How many young men do you know – even those who are Christians – who can so easily turn their gaze away from a beautiful young woman as she passes by, batting her eyes and waving one hand ever so shyly? But Joseph was focused, and he never lost sight of the values instilled in him by his father, Jacob. Joseph had long ago vowed to put God first, above all else, and he refused to break that vow, no matter the cost.
       That last rejection was too much for Potipher’s wife, and she had her revenge. She concocted a lie, claiming to her husband that it was Joseph who had tried to seduce her, and that he fled when she cried out. Potipher, naturally, believed her, and he had Joseph thrown in prison.
      At this point I’m sure Joseph felt dejected, discouraged, and sorrowful. For taking a stand and refusing to give into sin, this was his reward??? I’m sure there were many nights, alone in his cell, when Joseph silently cried out to God, wondering, like Job a few generations earlier, just what he had done to deserve this kind of punishment. Had God abandoned him after all? I’m sure there were long periods of doubt and fear, but, while the scripture doesn’t give any of this in detail, we do know that Joseph once again rolled up his sleeves, dug in his heels, took a deep breath and adapted. He looked around and saw an opportunity to do what he had always done up to this point: work hard, please his master, and, thus, gain favor in the sight of the chief jailer. (39:21-23)
         God was still with Joseph, and blessed his work as the keeper of all the prisoners. Just as with Potipher, Joseph was so trusted by the chief jailer that that man “…looked not to anything that was under his [Joseph’s] hand.” (39:23) And thus, by God’s hand, Joseph was in the right position at the right time to help two new prisoners: Pharoah’s chief cook and chief baker. While under Joseph’s guard, the two men told him about their unusual dreams, which Joseph was able to interpret. He then made a special request of the chief butler: “But think on me when it shall be well with thee, and shew kindness, I pray thee, unto me, and make mention of me unto Pharaoh, and bring me out of this house. For indeed I was stolen away out of the land of the Hebrews: and here also have I done nothing that they should put me into the dungeon.” (40:14-15)
Just as Joseph predicted, within three days the chief butler was restored to his former position, but the chief baker was executed for his offense. Unfortunately, however, the chief butler forgot all about Joseph, and Joseph remained in the dungeon of Pharoah’s palace for another two years. Although the Bible doesn’t tell us Joseph’s state of mind during those two years between chapters 40 and 41, it’s not hard to imagine the young Hebrew’s discouragement and despondency. It’s how I would feel in his place, but I’m sure, also, that Joseph’s faith never wavered, nor did he lose heart. Instead, he remained patient, and, as always, he continued trusting God.
           God, once again, rewarded Joseph’s faithfulness and patience. This time it was Pharaoh himself that suffered a disturbing dream, yet none of his wise men or magicians could interpret it. It was then that the chief butler remembered Joseph, and he told the Pharaoh about the Hebrew prisoner’s unusual ability to explain dreams. Pharoah immediately summoned Joseph who, because of the length of his imprisonment, had to clean himself up and put on new clothes before he could come into Pharoah’s presence. Pharoah asked Joseph about his skill in dream interpretation, and Joseph explained that it was not him, but God, who was the true source of that gift. When Joseph explained to Pharaoh that there would be seven years of plenty which would then be followed by seven years of great famine, the Pharoah became understandably distraught.
           But Joseph wasn’t done. He then offered a solution to Pharaoh that would ensure Egypt would survive the famine. Pharoah was so impressed with Joseph’s ability to interpret dreams as well as his plan to save Egypt that he immediately made the young Hebrew – who was about to turn 30 years old – the second highest ruler in all of Egypt. He gave Joseph the responsibility of implementing his plan to store up the grain and other crops that would be used to get the empire through the famine.
        And, just like that, Joseph went from the lowly status of forgotten prisoner to a man of immense wealth and power – as well as the gift of a new wife – almost overnight. He had his own office, his own household, servants, chariots, and, within the next seven years, two sons: Manasseh and Ephraim. And yet, nowhere in scripture is it recorded that all of this success and wealth became a stumbling block for Joseph. He remained faithful to God, serving Him just as steadfastly and wisely as he did when he had nothing and was nobody. All of Egypt paid him respect, and his authority was unquestioned. When the seven year famine began, and all of Egypt came to Pharaoh to seek aid, he pointed to Joseph and said, “Talk to that guy.” (41:55) By the time Joseph’s brothers came to Egypt seeking corn (the famine was not just in Egypt; all the lands surrounding it were also suffering), Joseph’s appearance, as well as his status, was wholly Egyptian.
            It was nearly twenty years since Joseph’s brothers had last seen him, and although Joseph recognized them immediately, they did not know him. Joseph could have revealed right then and there who he was. But he – and, by extension, those of us reading this story – didn’t know if his brothers were the same selfish, arrogant and jealous men that had sold him into slavery so long ago, or if they had changed as much as he had in the time since. Thus, Joseph wisely kept his true identity hidden, and he initiated a series of elaborate tests that would prove the character of his brothers. Over the course of a year, he tested his brothers, forcing them to confront their guilt and their shame over what they had done to Joseph almost two decades earlier. (See the conversations between the brothers and their father, as well as Judah’s passionate, heartfelt plea to Joseph, in chapters 42-44 of Genesis. Also, look back again at Judah’s story in chapter 38.)
           All of this testing was not done by Joseph out of a desire for petty revenge. Quite the opposite, in fact. Joseph had grown so much in his faith in God, as well as in wisdom of leadership and all the other traits that I’ve discussed earlier, that he longed to forgive his brothers and be reconciled to them. But first there had to be an admission of guilt and a desire on their part for repentance and reconciliation as well. This is another key trait of the man of God. Again, it’s not one that I gave a specific number to on my list, but I listed forgiveness under the trait of a prayerful heart because it’s a habit that will come naturally if we are walking close with God and are sensitive to the working of the Holy Spirit. Forgiveness, however, is one of the most difficult traits for us to learn and to practice, and yet, as with all the other traits that define the man of God, Joseph displayed remarkable wisdom and maturity by not seeking revenge on his brothers when it was well within his power and influence to do so. Instead, he demonstrated the exact opposite: compassion, love, and a desire for reconciliation above all else. But, before reconciliation, there had to be an acknowledgment from his brothers of their wrongdoing and their guilt. Without this, there could not have been the heartfelt, emotional and gripping scene of Genesis 45:1-15. These were not the same jealous, petty, impulsive and selfish men that had sold their innocent brother into slavery all those years ago, and Joseph was so overcome with joy at being reunited with his family that all of Pharaoh’s household heard his great weeping. (45:2)
           Thus, the saga of Joseph and his brothers, the sons of Jacob whose descendants would be greater than the number of sands on the beach or the stars on the sky (Genesis 17:4-6), ends on a glorious note of rejoicing amidst an emotional family reunion. Because of Joseph and his new position of power and influence within Egypt’s government, as well as his close friendship with Pharaoh, he was able to save all of his family by bringing them to live in Egypt. Over the next 400 years, God would bless His chosen people as the fledgling nation rapidly grew in number amid the prosperity and kindness of Pharaoh’s descendants. One of the most beautiful verses in the whole Bible is Genesis 50:20: “But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.”
        The story of Joseph is not just a moving account of God’s providence and His love for His chosen people. It’s also a beautiful picture of His son, Jesus Christ, and how He would one day reconcile all sinners to God through His death on the cross. There are a myriad of similarities in Joseph and his life – both great and small – that rhyme perfectly with many details in the birth, life and death of Jesus more than a millennia later. The saga of Joseph is one of the strongest typological foreshadows of Christ in the Old Testament, and it’s the primary reason that Joseph is also a fitting example of what it means to be a man after God’s own heart.
 
       For me, personally, the greatest example of a man who has demonstrated a life lived consistently in the pattern of a man after God’s own heart is my father, Robert Jones. (The reason my first name is spelled like it is is because it’s my dad’s middle name.) I did not set out to write this post specifically in honor him. But as I put all of this together, and as I look back now over my childhood and all the years of my adult life since, it’s so clear to me how he displayed every single trait on this list in spades. As I noted in the anecdote under trait #1, my dad put God first above everything else in his life: his wife and children, his career, his church ministry, etc. Because of that, all the other traits – humility, diligence, patience, faithfulness, self-control, a prayerful heart, compassion and love for others, and a love for Jesus Christ most of all – manifested in his daily life to such a degree that it’s impossible to talk about him without describing his Christian testimony. No, he’s not perfect. He would tell you himself he’s just a sinner saved by grace, same as the rest of us. He has his weaknesses and faults, but all my memories from childhood are only of the man that God molded him into. I’ve long ago forgotten the rest. Even during my difficult teen years when our relationship became very strained because of my constant rebellion, my father never displayed anything but love and patience and godly authority towards me. (Also, it’s clear to me now why I had such trouble in my young life. I refused the request of God to His children in Proverbs 23:36, the same request that my father asked of me many times back then: I would not let go and surrender my heart.)
         My parents are one of the big reasons – if not the primary cause – of my surrendering to God. Had it not been for them praying for me every single day and demonstrating God’s love by not outright rejecting me because of my former, wicked lifestyle, I very likely wouldn’t be here today, writing this post. Instead, God chose to answer their prayer by drawing me to Him, and so I’m here today, eagerly looking forward to what God has in store for me in the coming years.
          It's also fitting that  I am writing this less than a week from dad’s 74th birthday. As I look ahead to the life to which God has called me, and as I study and prepare to be a husband and father, my dad and his living testimony have always been in the back of my mind as an ideal of how I should strive to live for God. (The pic at the top of this post is of my dad studying his Bible one morning with me, less than a year old, on his lap.) If I am even a tenth of the godly man, husband and father that he was – and still is now as a grandfather – then I will consider myself fortunate.
           Happy birthday, dad! Love you!