Chapter 29: The Godly Woman

           Proverbs 31:10-12 – “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.”
 
          Last Sunday, Mother’s Day, my pastor preached his sermon on Proverbs 31:10-31. I thought it fitting to make the topic of my next chapter of my journey on the godly woman since my last posting was about the godly man. Unlike the man after God’s own heart, God picked this passage in Proverbs to list neatly and succinctly all the virtues and characteristics of the godly woman.

1. She is diligent and studious. (v.13-19) The godly wife rises early before the rest of her household and is still working long after everyone else is in bed. She is not lazy, nor idle, nor a gossip. She is always diligent with her hands, working and providing for her household. She is wise and industrious, seeing to the needs of her family before her own.
2. She is merciful and generous. (v.20-25) She uses all her resources to feed, clothe and provide for her family, as well as giving to the poor and needy outside her home. She uses those resources wisely and efficiently, wasting nothing. She and her family are clothed and cared for in all seasons. (v.21-22)
3. She is discreet, wise and discerning. (v.26-31) The godly wife knows her place at her husband’s side. She brings honor to her husband by doing and exercising all the virtues and characteristics listed in points 1 and 2. (v.23) Her husband is even more respected and praised outside their home precisely because of his wife’s godly virtues, traits and her diligence in all matters of their home life. But even more than that, the godly wife is discreet and wise. She does not gossip or complain or backbite. She doesn’t practice idleness or laziness. She speaks wisdom, kindness and prudence. (v.26) She rears her children in a godly way, teaching them what is right and true, and reinforcing the leadership and discipline of her husband on them when necessary. (v.28) This, too, brings respect and honor to her husband.

 
          Since I used my dad in my previous post as an example in my own life of a godly man, it’s only fitting that I expound for a bit on my mother in the light of this passage from Proverbs. I could write a whole book listing all the things that my mother did for me and my brothers when we were growing up – and what she continues to do today. I could write a second book on the proper example she displayed of the partnership of a godly woman to her godly husband. However, there’s not time or space for all of that here.
       What I will say, instead, is that my mother exhibited every single one of the characteristics, virtues and traits listed in this passage in Proverbs. I specifically remember many, many instances throughout my childhood when she was up and out of bed long before any of us and still awake long after midnight. I know this because when I arrived at the kitchen table in the morning, some piece of a school project that I or my brothers needed help with was done and ready for us, and it hadn’t been started when we went to bed the night before. I always think of my mom whenever I read Proverbs 31:15.
          No, my mother wasn’t prefect by any means. Like all of us she was just a sinner saved by grace, and she had a heart for God and a love for my dad and us boys. She was a wife first and a mother second, and me and my brothers never went without meals, clothes, or school supplies, or a home-baked cake for our birthdays, or lessons in cooking as well as sewing a button back onto our favorite shirt (which I have long ago forgotten, sadly,). My mother, a registered nurse, was also adept at the emergency removal of pencil lead from the cheek of one child while the brother that stabbed him looked on with shock and fear. I can’t remember now which of us stabbed who, but my mother could also dispense righteous punishment with a wrath that would make God pleased. (Once, when I was very young, my mother broke the back of a hairbrush by accident when she didn’t have a wooden spoon close at hand to give me a much deserved spanking.)
          God did not bless me with any sisters, and my mom learned early and quickly how to be a godly mother to four crazy, rowdy, smelly, dirty, reckless and wild boys who loved to test the limits of her patience and reflexes, as well as my dad’s health insurance coverage. (We loved to launch our dirt bikes off homemade ramps in the street. We also forgot about helmets half the time.) We were in constant competition with one another over nearly everything – most of it stupid – and mom learned how to referee with the best of them, though, admittedly, Jeremy’s and my teen years were rougher on our mother than she ever let on.
          And that’s another thing about my mom: she kept hidden from us what needed to be hidden. She was wise, discerning, and rarely displayed the sorrow or pain that our decisions or actions would sometimes cause her, especially in our teen years. Neither she nor my dad ever shielded us from the consequences of our own poor choices, and while we knew most of the time how much we had hurt them, my mom was adept at often hiding the true depth of hurt and disappointment that those consequences brought us. That’s just what a mother does sometimes.
      God blessed my parents with many grandchildren – and, recently, a great granddaughter – and my mom has been thrilled to play those roles. My brothers have had more daughters than sons, which I have always felt was God’s way of blessing my mom with girls since she had none of her own. It’s my hope to add more names to her list of grandchildren in the near future, God willing. God gave me an excellent role model of what a godly wife and mother should be, and I thank Him for her every day! (And I tell her that too!)
 
       After completing the notes for the sermon, I added the following addendum while pastor expounded on examples from scripture of godly women and mothers. (Look up the stories of Jochabed, Hannah and Timothy’s mother and grandmother, Lois and Eunice., to name a few.)
 
Note to self:
         My prayer to God every day is that He will gift me with the woman described in these verses. As a man of God, I will love, care for, and support my wife in such a manner that she will be able to fulfill and exercise every one of those characteristics and traits listed in that passage. She, in turn, will desire to love, support and obey me as the head of our home. (Ephesians 5:22-28) In other words, it starts with me. If I do my part right as the godly man, it should create the desire in my wife to be godly woman. Together, we will rear our children in the LORD, training them up in the way that they should go. (Proverbs 22:6 & 23:26.)  This will, in turn, create the desire in our children to love, respect and obey us as their parents. This is God’s blueprint for the Christian home.
        “As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” (Joshua 24:14-15)
        Amen!